Friday, July 10, 2015

LJD'S WEEKLY CATCH UP: What I thought of Jurassic World and Minions

I finally got to see Jurassic World. What a stupid idiotic movie. What was even the point of Bryce Dallas Howard’s character? She was as dumb as shit, idiotic and running around in a suit was ridiculous. Once more, dinosaurs proved they should never be brought back to life.

While I loved the little shout outs to the original movie with the guy’s tshirt, and finding the old ruins and jeeps, the whole premise, plus dialogue was crap. Mixing a raptor with a rex is one of the dumbest things to do, clearly, and while people may want to bring back dinos it is just not a good idea.

Chris Pratt reminds me of Liam from Bold & Beautiful, and the dialogue between his character and Bryce’s was pathetic, inane garbage. Vincent D’ Onofrio got what he deserved and the owner, rich as he was, clearly didn’t know shit. Seriously, what is the point of gene mixing a dino if you have no way of containing it and dealing with it if it gets loose? NO ONE LEARNED FROM MOVIE #1. 

And that little kid, he was a painful little whiny crying shit (really, crying over a potential divorce at a dino park, get fucking real) who needed a fucking haircut. His brother was better equipped to deal with the shit that was happening, except for when they came upon the restricted area which HE SHOULD NOT HAVE GONE THROUGH because guess what happened next?????

And Steven Spielberg supposedly had a hand in this?  Oi!

Jesus, there was far better dialogue in the original with Sam, Laura and Jeff Goldblum, who I loved.

One last thing, that I really don’t get, is why they run in front of, around, in between the legs of the dinos instead of running in the opposite direction. She led the rex out to kill the raptor-rex and she ended up on the ground lying there while they fought. DUMB.AS.SHIT!

Then there was Mionions. Like the Lego movie it had its good bits, but overall, meh, too long. It was cutesie in parts, boring in others, all I can say is...KING BOOOOOBBBBB!

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